Sunday, July 13th, 2008

This morning instead of going to my typical church I went to Emmanuel Lutheran Church representing LSG.  Emmanuel Lutheran is a small African-American Church that has so much potential for growing.  It reminded me a lot of my former church in Baltimore.  I miss those dynamics that Emmanuel had and the small feel of the church.  People came up to me and I knew that these people were happy to see me and happy that I was worshiping with them.  Going to a large church does have it benefits but it does not have that close feeling that I grew up with.  I feel the event at Emmanuel was very successful and I do believe that we were successful able to get the word out about adoption.  

Coming home I got stuck in a very heavy down pour.  It rained hard from the time I left Emmanuel till about an hour after I got home.  This was some serious rain people.  The roads were so filled with water that my car was struggling to stay above 40 miles an hour.  It took me an hour to get home which was double the amount of time it would normally take.  But with rain comes flowers.  Atlanta needs the rain and I’m sure these storm have helped with their drought situation.  

The rest of my day consisted of playing with the trains and watching television.  I love being lazy on Sundays.  Les likes to watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition and I usually join him since I have nothing else to do on a Sunday night.  I typically avoid watching the show because it makes me cry.  Tonight was no different and the individual who impacted me the most tonight was the young man who had inspired the team to come out and build his family a new house, Patrick Henry Hughes.  Patrick was born with no eyes and a number of birth defects have left him with the inability to stretch his limbs out 180 degrees.  Patrick is bound to his wheelchair and relies on his parents for assistance.  The house he was living in was not handicapped accessible.  He had to at times craw on the floor while he dragged his wheelchair up different ramps throughout the house.  The situation that he was living in was not livable but he really was not complaining.  While he wanted a new house he was very happy with the hand God had dealt him.  He told Tye Pennington that he does not see his blindness as a disability but rather an ability.  People that can see judge on the outside before they judge on the inside.  While Patrick’s eyes may not work, his mind does and he is a highly gifted musician.  He plays pieces simply by ear and is even in the University of Louisville’s marching band.  His father pushes him in formation while Patrick plays the trumpet.  Along with the trumpet, Patrick is a brilliant pianist and vocalist.  He has inspired the entire city of Louisville, Kentucky with his music and his outlook on life.  It made me question how I view the world.  While I will continue to advocate to for social change and social equality, but what if I or even each of us had to live with blinders on and all we saw the world was as black and white.  Not even black and white but grayscale.  Colors did not matter and we judge solely on our actions and the content of our minds.  I think I rather live in a world like that but unfortunately tomorrow when I wake up and go into work and back into society, those blinders will be removed from me and everyone else.  What divides us as a group of people will continue to divide us and Patrick’s words will fade back into the distance.  Still knowing all of this, Patrick still inspires me.

I have been having a rough time emotionally as the two year anniversary approaches for my life altering hospital stay.  I cannot stop thinking about where I was two years ago and just thinking that this pain was nothing and would go away in a few days.  Little did I know but that pain I was having was more serious and very deadly.  I look back and wonder how different my life would be if I would never have gotten sick.  I would be on CPE right now and preparing to enter my second year in seminary.  I would have graduated on time and probably would not be writing this blog because I would not have to write a blog for CPE.  I remember the pain of having IV’s stuck in me every single day.  I remember the pain of seeing friends faces as they walked in my room to say hi but also to say goodbye.  I remember the look in my mom’s eyes as she held my hand when the pain was so bad. I remember seeing my dad crying because I was in this hospital bed and not standing next to him telling him everything would be ok.  I remember my brother walking up to Lexington Market to buy me a small stereo so I could listen to music in order that I would not be in so much pain.  So many of these images torture me and haunt me everyday.  But unlike Patrick, unless you know me and know everything that happened to me you would just think of me as an average guy.  Patrick lives with his wounds visibility everyday and people judge him because of those wounds before they get to know him.  I am able to hide.

So the question still remains.  If I was able to go back and change history and never get sick would I do it?  Well I will tell you...in just a few days.  Thank you Patrick for inspiring us to look beyond the outer and look at the inner.  I hope in my lifetime and your lifetime as well that we will one day all see the world as you do.